When I throw away some household gadget that I got and used during our life together, or when I acquire a new one that he will never use or see...
When I gaze with pleasure at my newly-created sunroom where his dark and cluttered office used to be...
When I cook things he wasn't allowed to eat...
When I decide not to watch a TV show he liked, or one that we used to watch together...
When I watch something he would not have liked, and enjoy it heartily...
When I wear something new that he never saw me in...
... I feel the past retreating, faster and faster, growing ever more distant.
I move forward in my life. I do the things that work for me now. (There is no more us.) And I am happy about the things I do to make my life work for me. They are all my choices. I like them.
Nevertheless I cry.
Oh my Rosemary;
ReplyDeleteThis is fantastic.
Thank you for understanding the crafting. :)
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear that, nice poem.
ReplyDelete: )
Thanks, Joseph. :)
DeleteCrying is actually so very good for us.... sending you happy tears!
ReplyDeleteVery true! Thank you.
Delete