To look after myself as we'll as I did him — that's what it boils down to.
I find myself getting weepy about nice things I bought and little efficiencies I put in place to make our lives easier and pleasanter. I weep because he is no longer around to benefit. Some things I'm inclined not to bother with now, because of that. But I catch myself — I am still here, I can benefit.
So I do what makes life easier and use the things that give me pleasure. But I have to remind myself, and I don't always care very much.