So here I am in my new workroom, or rather play room, sitting at the desk by the window, looking out on the pretty street through the trees. The sun has moved around and would be pouring in the window at my left shoulder if I had the blind open. I don't, and it is pleasantly warm and not glary.
I realise that, although I have been thinking the room is now complete — as of this morning — I have given no thought to the placement of an electric fan, which will be essential. Andrew used it have his in the very corner where I am sitting, near the power points. I have not left a corner or even a bit of wall free to put one, so it will have to be in the middle of the room somewhere. I'll work it out. It probably won't be really necessary until summer.
He never had the blinds open, for fear of the heat damaging his computers, and also I suppose for privacy, especially at night. But it's nice to sit here and look out. The 8-year-old girl from across the road has a boy visiting her; he looks a bit older. That family usually has visitors to stay during school holidays, and it's nice to see them playing in the street. We are at the head of a quiet cul-de-sac, at the top of a hill, so it is safe for them to do that. The cars come slowly, so there is time for the kids to get out of the way, and time for the drivers to see the kids.
The street itself feels friendly. I have a notion that it tunes in to the people who come here and takes our imprint, reading who we are. I think it likes me well enough.
I wanted to integrate this room into the rest of the house — not have it be that room with the closed door, up the end of the passage, where Andrew used to be.
When it was his office, it became more and more crowded. I realise now that this was because walking got harder and harder for him. Easer to have his filing cabinet in here rather than outside the door, in the passage. Easier to place his desk and the big old wooden table he used as a bench at right angles to each other so he could sit in one chair to work at both, merely swivelling it around. And all his boxes of notes and papers were accessible to him here, as they were not when out in the garage. I wish I'd taken a photo of that cluttered space, for a 'before' and 'after' comparison.
Of course it doubled as spare room. At first it had the pull-out couch / double bed we'd used as a spare for some years, but that took up too much space. We swapped it for a singe bed. Everything was still a very close fit. When I had family visiting recently, I acquired a second spare bed to accommodate them all. His desk and table are long gone; in fact the desk fell apart as I removed it. It had evidently been wedged into place by the table and that's what kept it functional!
I am nodding off in this pleasant space. A minute ago my head nearly crashed on to the desk. Well, what do you know? There are two beds in here. It was my intention they should function as day beds between visitors. That causes a slight pang, as in the past the one that was here sometimes served as a day bed for Andrew — though not for so very long, as he became more and more unwell and spent a lot of time in our real bed.
Ah well, that is the past. I have been making my home into what suits me now. I even spoke out loud to Andrew, as I finished the job this morning, inviting him to admire what I had done. (After all he has no need for an office any more.) So I'll just allow myself to succumb to sleep, and have a little snooze on one of the beds, with the warm sun coming in.
